An Open Letter to Shared Laundry Room Users

Share Button

Dear Users,

We need to have a talk about laundry room etiquette. Well, it's more like you need to listen to me talk and then immediately start following my instructions.

As we all know, in our building basement there are four washers and four dryers. Rarely are all eight machines operational at once. The washer takes roughly 30 minutes to complete its cycle. The dryer takes roughly 50. Let's use those numbers and times as guidelines for behavior. Continue reading An Open Letter to Shared Laundry Room Users

Published by

Jon Hoferle

Don’t love thy neighbor? 20 head-scratching neighbor complaints as told to a former property manager

Share Button

Many years ago when I worked in property management, one of my biggest headaches was responding to tenants' complaints about their neighbors.

I'd answer the phone and on the other end would be an angry, often sleep-deprived person. Often they would yell. Sometimes they would speak in a firm tone. Occasionally they would cry.

I'd do my best to put myself their position -- after years of hearing the same complaints, it was easy to become desensitized. To resolve the call, I would promise to send the offending neighbor a letter instructing them to cease the pattern of disturbance immediately.

A few days later, I'd get a call from person who received the letter. Invariably, this person would deny knowing anything about any disturbances and demand to know who complained. I would explain that in the interest of not starting a blood feud, the most specific term I could use was  “a neighbor.” Continue reading Don’t love thy neighbor? 20 head-scratching neighbor complaints as told to a former property manager

Published by

Jon Hoferle

35 Terms That Should Be Banished From Apartment Ads (and what they really mean)

Share Button

There are a lot of Internet listings for Chicago apartments. One could spend several lifetimes trying to read them all. Since we have but one lifetime, it seems reasonable that each apartment listing should immediately share the neighborhood, number of bedrooms and baths, and offer a few words honestly describing the apartment.

Well...maybe two out of three ain't bad.

The agents who write the listings have got the location and bedrooms/baths down cold. It's the honest description that trips them up. A quick browse of the first 100 apartments listed on Craigslist City of Chicago apartments tells me the following:

8 are spacious.
7 are gorgeous. Continue reading 35 Terms That Should Be Banished From Apartment Ads (and what they really mean)

Published by

Jon Hoferle

No more unicorns: how I’m learning to write for a business.

Share Button

A company always needs someone to write content – for the website, newsletters, emails, advertising. When we decided that writing for RentConfident would be part of my job, my brain began to buzz. Before, I had only written for my own personal pleasure. Now I would be writing for an audience. I had so many ideas. I had visions of broadcasting my mind to the world.

Coming from a creative writing background, I wrote stories to entertain. I was used to opening the hinge on the top of my head and allowing my imagination to spill out in all of its sensory glory. Then all I did was describe:

  • the rainbow halo of dew on the grass
  • the wind's sigh as it rushes through the meadow
  • the smell of the unicorn's mane (like horse and cotton candy)

I soon found out that unicorns are of very little use to a business writer. Writing for business uses a different muscle. For me, good creative writing is plunging into the world within my own mind and describing that world as if it were reality. However, good business writing is taking an idea, a concept, or a message and fitting it into the world within the customer's mind.

I'm working on it. I'm getting better. Still, sometimes I find myself practicing old habits.

I'll be sitting at my computer, composing an email explaining the RentConfident Confidence Factor, and suddenly I'll be typing: We discovered the formula for the Confidence Factor carved into a tablet in the center of a deep dark forest. To find this tablet, we had to:

  • Wade through a foul swamp
  • Evade an army of killer ants
  • Solve the riddle: I have one where none should be. I gallop through the trees. I signal purity.

Then I stop. I take a breath and instead write: The RentConfident Confidence Factor starts with a score of 100. We deduct points for every risk factor found, such as:

  • City Violations
  • Unpaid property taxes
  • High neighborhood crime

I finish the email and move on to the next thing.

Sometimes I want to return to the world of free-flowing ideas, long descriptive passages, and not caring if everyone is going to understand or appreciate what I write.

But then I remind myself that there's an elegance to good business writing, and it can be beautiful. If I explain RentConfident clearly, if I convince a few people to try it, and those people find a great apartment -- then that's even better than escape into fantasy. That's helping people in the real world.

And it's a good way to get the unicorns out of my mind.

Published by

Jon Hoferle

[QUIZ] What’s Your Apartment Hunting Personality?

Share Button

Have you ever wondered if you’re too picky about your apartments? Do you want to know how you stack up against other apartment hunters when it comes to your wants and needs? Take the RentConfident Apartment Hunting Personality Quiz and find out! The quiz will let you know if agents are secretly laughing at your over-the-top demands or if slumlords see you as an easy mark. As an added bonus, we’ll let you know how your tastes translate into the Confidence Factor that appears on every RentConfident Signature Report.

The RentConfident Confidence Factor is a score between 1 and 100 that measures the risks of renting an apartment. A higher Confidence Factor means it's less likely that your apartment choice will cause you personal loss, injury, or annoyance. But people have different lifestyles, budgets, and values. Just as some students in school are only happy with straight A's, other students are perfectly fine with a passing grade. That is to say, everyone's ideal Confidence Factor is different.

Take the quiz below. Find out how you stack up against your friends. Maybe you’ll find a compatible roommate when you share your score!

[wp_simple_survey id="1"]

Published by

Jon Hoferle